[CentOS] [OT] Witty one liners or computer related proverbs

Dear All,

I need some witty computer related proverbs or one liners that some of 
have used in the past as footers for your emails for example.

I particularly remember a PERL based transliteration joke/footer that 
when run in PERL produces a witty output....

This is to fix a problem internally created by an over zealous salesman 
at my company pinning up A4 sheets with bullSh*t sales proverbs on them!!!

thanks

Pete